Autumn Leaves

One of my most favorite things about Fall is leaf jumping! I absolutely loved it as a kid, making a big pile in the yard, jumping and playing in them. We would create huge piles  and run and jump. Or we’d bury each other in them and sometimes just lay there.

It’s hard to describe but there’s just something comforting about laying in the leaves, being surrounded by them. Both leaf jumping and lying in the them is something that I still enjoy and love as an adult!

Of course I was super excited to introduce this activity to my kids. Except in our backyard the number of leaves we had was small, being in a newer neighborhood. They loved it too.

On the weekend the kids went to Parkland Park with their Dad, which is an older community in Calgary where the trees are huge and the leaves are abundant. Luke, Chloe and Matthew all enjoyed playing in the leaves, Chloe even laying down and having a ‘sleep’.

I think this weekend we will all have to go and find some more leaves to jump in 🙂

 

It All Happens for a Reason

I find that in this day and age when someone says yes to you that it may not always mean ‘yes’. It may mean ‘yes for now, yes if nothing better comes up, yes if I feel like it that day’, etc. The meaning of yes which used to mean ‘yes I will regardless of what obstacles cross my path’ seems to be missing.

For me, when I say I am going to be there, or will help you or will do something, I will. You don’t have to ask me twice or remind me, you can consider it a done deal. I am not sure why today a lot of people don’t feel that way.

This past weekend was a prime example of this. I had hosted an Open House to promote my other business Your Inner Light, where I do Angel Readings, Dream Interpretation and Reiki. I had done so last year about this time and it was a great success. I cleaned my house top to bottom, did energy clearing and setting new, preparing food and treats (all homemade) in anticipation of my guests.

Now I realize with an open house that people do not have to RSVP but I had had 8 people who had given me a definite yes that they would be here. 1 pm came, 2 pm came, 3 pm came….not a soul turned up, not one. And no one had called, emailed or sent any other form of communication that they could no longer make it. I was thoroughly disappointed and felt like I had gone to all that work for nothing.

But nothing is for nothing (if that makes sense). In the end I had a beautiful clean house to enjoy for a while. And everything happens for a reason. I believe that my house really needed a good cleaning, both physically and energetically and that I needed a little motivation to do so. What we sometimes fail to realize is that the energy in our homes can get stuck and take up space, blocking other things that we want to come into our lives, whatever it may be, a child, a new love, car, friend, etc. If we don’t move it then that energy will just continue to block what it is we want.

That’s why they say it is good to move your furniture around or change the way you display pictures, etc. as it shifts the energy, frees things up and gets things moving again. The same goes for physically cleaning and getting into all those nooks and crannies that don’t normally get cleaned. I dusted picture frames, washed walls and outlets, windows and window sills. I drummed, I smudged. As I was cleaning and clearing I could feel the difference in the room. In fact it felt so good in here I wanted to cancel my date with my girlfriend this morning to just enjoy my house!

It is also healing for us physically to do that kind of thorough clean. It is like clearing our own energy, releasing things that we no longer need, whether physical items or energetically. I find it kind of like a ritual, I like to do it alone (usually with fantastic tunes) and I like to do it until I am done. I had offers of help so I could be done sooner, but I politely declined, because I knew what it would do for me.

It felt so good when I was done. I could notice the difference on the main level, how good it felt. I could see my entire kitchen table for the first time in months, having finally sorted through and put all the papers away. It was absolutely awesome!

Sometimes in our busy lives we need a purpose, a motivation to do the things we know we need to. For myself, I always left the papers because just looking at the pile made me feel overwhelmed and unsure what to do with them. But when I had a purpose, a mission, it gave me the motivation to just suck up and do it! and now I am so glad I did.

So regardless of the number of people I had come by on the weekend, it was not all totally in vain, because I have a feeling that I have just opened up the doorway and shifted some energy for some really great things to come into my life now (some stuff that was pretty stuck). In fact I am pretty excited about it.

Halloween Joy

Halloween is almost upon us and as parents we get excited about what to dress the little ones up in. The euphoria of the older kids who know what it’s all about eagerly pick out or make their costumes, anticipating the candy rush that is to follow an evening of going door to door. But the little ones, say 3 and under, have no idea what is going on and could probably care less.

Yet we as parents are so excited to get the little ones into a costume cause honestly it is so cute! We can’t wait to get the perfect picture and share it with all our family and friends. Yet many a time we have a picture like this – where the child is crying cause they are so unhappy about this costume thing, whether they are too warm, squished into it, or just don’t like the idea. And we tend to look at the picture and go “Oh poor little guy!” and then gush about how cute the costume is.

You know sometimes we say “The things we do for our kids” but sometimes we should consider the things they do for us 🙂 ha ha

 

The Importance of One on One

Hiking at Moraine Lake

In many of the parenting articles I have read over the years they have often suggested that as the number of children in your family increased that you should make time to spend with each child one on one. Give them each a bit of time with just you and them, and with each parent individually. Yet as the number of children in the household increases the amount of ‘leisure time’ seems to decrease comparatively as there are more activities, more friends to play with and more things to do in general, like cleaning and laundry!

Where do you find the time exactly? The thing I have learned and been gently reminded of, is that kids don’t need large blocks of time or need to do fancy and exciting things during with you. They just want some time with you, it doesn’t matter to them how long or what you are doing; just that you spend time with them. Of course there are times when they would like to do something a little more involved and exciting (like laser tag, dinner or a movie), but they don’t always need that kind of activity with you on a regular basis. Your one on one focused attention is what they desire.

A prime example of this for me was this past Saturday. I had to take Matthew, my oldest, to pick out his frames and order his glasses. Our optometrist is up in Signal Hill, which is northwest Calgary and a bit of a drive for us. I had the opportunity to do this with just Matthew as D’Wayne had offered to watch the twins while we went.

Luke and Mom

Matthew was super excited to go. I had asked him to shower before we left, washing his hair and even suggested he dress up. He not only did as I asked but combed and parted his hair and put on a shirt and tie! He was bouncing and excited in the car as we drove to the optometrist, his eyes sparkling and chatting about this and that. It is not often that we get to go somewhere and have an uninterupted conversation, as usually the twins are chiming in or have something of their own to say.

He noticed and mentioned how I had showered and put on make-up and I responded, “Well if you’re dressing up then I should too.” He just smiled. Once we got to the optometrist we were literally only there for 10 minutes, as Matthew already knew which frames he wanted and it was just the details to sort out. I was kind of disappointed knowing that our time was so short. That’s when I decided we’d stop at Community Natural Foods on the way home. So we popped over there picking up a ‘few things’ (I had intended on only getting some vegan cream cheese but ended up with a few more items, especially with Matthew picking things up and asking to buy them. And honestly in that store he is asking for dried mangos and cheese, not chocolate bars and candy, very hard to say no).

Even this time in the Community Natural was fun, bonding and a way to continue to get to know each other. Yes he did ask me for many things, of which some I said yes and others no, but it was great. We laughed, we enjoyed.

Chloe and Mom

As I was driving home I realized then that the time I spend with him one on one does not always have to be fancy, simply focused and interactive. I have always made the effort to spend time with just him, either taking him to a movie, going for a walk or playing a board game at home once the twins are in bed. But I realized in that moment that whether it be a trip to the optometrist or a little grocery shopping as long as it’s him and me that was all that mattered. And if I could give him more moments like this, even at home, if only small, that that would make such a difference in our relationship. As I have even noticed that although sometimes I have to fight with him to come and dry the dishes, that once he is there, he is quite chatty and happy and we have some great conversations and connection happening.

I feel as parents yes it is important that we spend one on one time with each of our children but that we need to give ourselves a break and realize that it doesn’t have to be complicated or expensive, just a happy and enjoyable few moments (or more when possible) where we can connect with each other, and remember who we are to each other and in this world. To listen and recognize the beauty in our children and the great gifts that they bring to our world, as well as to share who we are and our wisdom with them. That is connection, that is bonding and that is something we don’t always achieve with all the kids together at once. It is not only rewarding for the child, but will be extremely rewarding for you as well.

Matthew and Mom